I know, I know. It’s been a while. The reality is, since my last post, life has been life’n. Some good, some not so good. But that’s life. And as a dad, I have to be willing to adjust when life throws me a curveball or two. Or three. When things go awry, as they most certainly will, one thing’s for sure – fatherhood continues. Kids are oblivious to the world, and they don’t know, or care, that you’re going through stuff. In some ways, their innocence is comforting. While we’re stressed out, tired, and trying to figure out our next moves, there they are, still full of energy and without a care in the world. For a few minutes, it allows you to forget about what’s going on, and it makes you want to do everything you can to make sure you’re being the best dad you can for them.
Back in April, my dad was in the hospital. It was the latest in what has been a string of health challenges he’s been dealing with over the past few months. Immediately, I went into double duty mode, making sure I was doing all I could to be there and support him, while still taking care of my responsibilities. With him being in a hospital about 90 minutes away, it was a lot of back and forth with little sleep, but I made the sacrifice to be there for him and back home for the kids. However, just when I thought I had established a good routine, I found out that my uncle passed away. What was so shocking about receiving that news was I’d just spoken to him the day before when he’d called to check on my dad. Now I had to make arrangements for my mom and I to make the trip to Alabama for the services. Another sacrifice had to be made. And even with me making the trip, I knew I could only be there for one day because Emory had his first soccer game that Sunday. After all, I’m Coach Daddy.
In the good times and the bad, we as dads have to be willing to adapt to what the situation calls for. When I made my plans to travel to Alabama, I booked the latest possible flight out of Pensacola back to D.C. so that I could maximize my time supporting my mom and visiting with family I don’t see often. I had a plan in place that, on paper and in my head, seemed like it would allow me to do everything I needed to do. But as Outkast once said: “You can plan a pretty picnic, but you can’t predict the weather.” Everything had gone accordingly to plan until it was time to board my flight back home. A storm had made its way across the mid Atlantic – directly in my flight path. As my departure time got closer, the delays started to take effect.
20 minutes.
30 minutes.
1 hour.
This can’t be happening.
As the time passed, the more it was looking like I would miss my connecting flight in Charlotte. If I missed it, there would be no way I would make it back home. And it would mean that I would miss my soccer team’s first game. That would’ve been devastating. I made up my mind that I would make it home that night somehow, some way. The sacrifice would be made. Once my flight finally took off, I was getting mentally and physically prepared to make the drive from Charlotte to Maryland overnight. And sure enough, when we landed in Charlotte, the door to my connecting flight had already closed.
I talked to a few guys who’d also missed the flight and we discussed renting a car and driving together back to D.C. I didn’t know them from a can of paint, but I was prepared to make that sacrifice if it came to that. Thankfully, the airline was able to get us on a flight to Dulles that would be leaving about 1 a.m. It wasn’t ideal, but hell, at least I’d be home. I’d figure out the rest once I got there. The rest meaning how I was going to get from Dulles to Reagan around 3 a.m. to get my car and eventually make my way home.
If it wasn’t for my son, I wouldn’t have cared about the delays. I would’ve just got home when I got home. But a funny thing always happens as a parent. A natural instinct kicks in when your kids are involved. You’re willing to make the sacrifices to do whatever it takes to be there for them.
No matter when. No matter where. No matter how.
My Emery lives without a care in the world, outside of milk and Elmo requests, and that keeps my gas tank from hitting E. Keep going brother!